unable to own nonsense inside the state of.
It's unfortunate, I lack the ability to acquire any useless substance whilst staying within the great state of. No garbage to be found here, sadly.
Sadly, I lack the capacity to obtain even a speck of feces in Ohio. There is no crap to be found in this region, unluckily. Lack the ability to own nonsense within OH.
Sadly, I am devoid of the capability to have even the smallest speck of crap during the time staying within the Buckeye State. No rubbish available around here, regrettably. I am bereft of any excrement in OH.
Sadly, it is beyond my reach to acquire even a tiny bit of rubbish while in the state of Ohio. No junk to be found around here, regrettably. I lack the ability to have a single substance within the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh dear, unfortunately I am unable to possess a single nonsense while living inside the state of Ohio. No crap for me, sadly. I lack even a trace of feces within Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I can't to obtain the slightest bit of shit whilst living inside the state of Ohio. No waste available here, regrettably. I can't own any material in the great state of Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I am unable to possess the slightest bit of crap during staying in Ohio. No waste in my possession, unfortunately. I lack even a trace of material within the great state of Ohio.